Long Island School Bans Footballs, Soccer Balls at Recess, Unclear Whether Kids Will Also Be Bubble-Wrapped

kidSome of the best football, soccer, kick ball and baseball games ever played were played at recesses all over the country, but it looks like at least one Long Island school is ready to end that time-honored tradition.

CBS New York (with a hat tip to The Big Lead) reports that Weber Middle School in Port Washington on Long Island has banned footballs, baseballs, lacrosse balls or anything that might hurt someone on school grounds. There’s no word in the report saying whether “having fun” is still allowed, but it probably isn’t.

Apparently the school has seen an increase in playground injuries of late.

“Some of these injuries can unintentionally become very serious so we want to make sure our children have fun, but are also protected,” superintendent Kathleen Maloney said, possibly in a whiny voice.

Long Island Jewish Medical center emergency room director Dr. Salvatore Pardo weighed in by saying the center has seen “head injuries, bumps, scrapes,” and that he is “worried about concussions.”

It should be noted that a TV report says it’s OK to use Nerf footballs in place of real footballs, but everyone knows Nerf footballs suck, so that’s still a loss for the kids.

Also on the list of banned activities are cartwheels and tag. No, seriously. Cartwheels and tag are a no-go at Weber as well, which means rec time at the local penitentiary will now be more fun than recess at Weber Middle School.

Below is a Google Maps screen shot of Weber Middle School. While the date of this photo is admittedly unclear, it doesn’t look like there’s much fun to be had out there, although it does look like there’s plenty of open space for things like football, soccer and tag. Luckily, however, it doesn’t appear that there’s any sort of play structure. With all of that hard plastic, metal and other man-made death traps, that’s would be something that would certainly have to be quarantined. Probably wouldn’t hurt to take down those trees, either, what with those limbs being dangerous and everything.

Then again, that further expose kids to the dangers of the sun. So they’re basically screwed until they build a big bubble wrap dome around the entire place.

weberSo what are these kids going to do for fun? The ball is in your court, Spt. Maloney and others, to help find ways to make sure these kids don’t have to spend recess just standing there staring at themselves. Just don’t bring that ball out to recess.

Yardbarker

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