FOXBORO, Mass. — It’s unclear how the conversation even turned to superheroes.
By the time I was walking to Martellus Bennett’s locker Thursday night, the talkative tight end already was chatting about grasshoppers and ants, not about his three receptions on four targets for 33 yards in the New England Patriots’ 34-22 win over the New Orleans Saints.
Then, somehow, Bennett began a pseudo-standup routine on Aquaman.
“Yeah, ‘Ant-Man’ was — eh, I’m not really — I don’t know,” Bennett said. “I’m a Bruce Wayne fan. If you’re not Bruce Wayne, who doesn’t have to save the world, he’s this great looking guy, wears great suits and has nice cars, and he wakes up in the middle of the night and is just like, ‘You know what? I’m gonna save Gotham. My city’s not doing well, I don’t have to save it. I have all this money. I could move somewhere else. You know what? I’m Bruce Wayne. I’m gonna do something about it. So, I have no super powers. I have a great guy named Alfred working for me who makes great peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, but now I’m going to do even a little bit more.’
“That’s Bruce Wayne. I love Bruce Wayne. I don’t like Peter Parker, and Aquaman is the next terrible guy, because he can’t save you if you’re not drowning. It’s like, ‘I’m on land Aquaman, there’s not many times I’m going to be at sea. I need your help today, and I’m on land, and here you are. Dolphins can’t come with me. I don’t know.”
It continued.
“I have not (seen ‘Suicide Squad’),” Bennett said. “They advertise too much. I don’t like movies that advertise a whole lot. They got me like that with the ‘Minions.’ And the ‘Minions’ movie was terrible.
“Jared Leto is a pretty good actor — I don’t know how we’re talking about this. But Jared Leto, I heard he did a great job. I mean, but then Heath Ledger, he’s probably the best version of it ever. My favorite ‘Batman’ villain was probably The Penguin, though.”
If you’re wondering, Bennett does not consider himself the NFL’s Bruce Wayne. And based on his play Thursday night, it might be an insult to call him the Robin to Rob Gronkowski’s Batman.
Thumbnail photo via Thumbnail photo via Doug Kyed/NESN
