Perhaps the strangest part about the Chicago Cubs’ trade for Jose Quintana is that it seemed to come out of the blue — unlike most blockbusters, it wasn’t preceded by any reports or rumors.
Of course, “KatyPerrysBootyHole” and “wetbutt23” would beg to disagree.
Don’t worry: We can explain. Those two, err, colorful pseudonyms belong to a pair of Reddit users who contribute to r/whitesox, a thread for Chicago White Sox fans. On Wednesday, “KatyPerrysBootyHole” (we know, it’s weird) posted to the thread about a possible Quintana trade involving the Cubs.
“Hey guys, take this with a grain of salt,” our favorite Katy Perry fan wrote, “But I heard from a friend who’s brother’s friend works for the Cubs (sounds like bull—- I know), that (Quintana) is going to the Cubs in exchange for 4 players. Has anyone heard anything similar?”
That’s when “wetbutt23” came through with the inside scoop.
“4 prospects. No pros,” wetbutt23 wrote. “Players were meeting with doctors and will be official tonight or tomorrow.”
Fast forward to Thursday morning, when the White Sox announced they had traded Quintana — for four prospects.
Who needs baseball writers when we can get our breaking news from Redditors with apparent soft spots for rear ends?
The best part of this whole ordeal, though, might have come from CSN Chicago, which issued what might be the best correction we’ve ever seen in a story about the Quintana trade:
These are strange times we live in, folks.
Thumbnail photo via Kim Klement/USA TODAY Sports Images