ESPY Awards Live Blog: Miami Heat Close Out Night With Awkward Award Acceptance

by abournenesn

Jul 11, 2012

ESPY Awards Live Blog: Miami Heat Close Out Night With Awkward Award Acceptance11:42: What an awkward, hilarious way to end the evening. Mike Miller and Juwan Howard? Really…? That’s the best the team could represent with?

Didn’t know LeBron James’ towel boys were considered a part of the team.

Anyway, we’re out here from the live blog. Hope you enjoyed our off-topic and sometimes irreverent “coverage.”

11:40: Is anyone else completely tired of the Fun. (yeah, that’s how the band’s name is actually stylized) song “We Are Young?”

Completely overplayed, and it sounds like the worst ripoff of The Offspring ever. Not that The Offspring haven’t done a good enough job of making a joke of themselves, too.

11:35: This seems a pretty good reason not to vote for Watson, right?

11:30: Not much of a surprise there with LeBron James winning Best Male Athlete.

Hard not to notice the tepid in-house applause, however. Even in a friendly environment, it seems the supposed king has a hard time catching a break.

11:17: There are some great faux Twitter accounts out there, and Tim Tebow’s win already seems to be one of the more controversial selections on the night. Thought we’d share this, seems about right.

11:12: You’re welcome.

11:06: How about RG3 there?

Did anyone else notice that he was working the room, making eye contact while reciting his lines in his presentation? With everyone else staring straight into the teleprompter, clearly reading their lines, it appears the future Redskins quarterback may be the heir to Peyton Manning’s impressive acting career.

10:57: We have to admit, Olivia Munn looked really good. WEEI’s Jerry Thornton had a pretty hilarious take on her appearance.

And yeah, we agree about Shaun White. Gingers are creepy.

10:52: In terms of best comeback player, the Matthew Stafford pick is kind of a joke.

The kind of physical shoulder injury that Stafford suffered, while serious, isn’t the potentially life-altering kind of injury that Sidney Crosby, for instance, faced in dealing with concussions, especially with all we’ve learned about them over the past couple years.

On that subject, the magnum opus was John Branch’s three-part piece on late former NHL enforcer Derek Boogaard for the New York Times. It’s a gut-wrenching piece, and shines an important light on just how serious head injuries are. Check it out, it’s one of the best pieces of journalism you’ll ever read.

10:50: Per ESPN’s Twitter account, you can view the entirety of the Pat Summit tribute online.

10:40: It’s hard not to note the complete overuse of the Foo Fighters as a soundtrack throughout the ESPY broadcast.

Quite frankly, I’m not exactly sure how to feel about this band. On the one hand, they’ve had a number of absolutely anthemic tunes. On the other, their music falls within an extremely generic “rock and roll” designation, without really any distinguishing properties.

Either way, they probably make a good background to sports. And “Everlong” is an all-time great song.

10:25: Very appropriate tribute to Pat Summit here during the show, particularly less than a month removed from the 30th anniversary of Title IX, one of the landmark moments in the history of women’s sports.

10:05: Nice to see Joel McHale up there as a presenter.

For anyone who’s not familiar with McHale outside of The Soup, you absolutely need to be watching Community, which is barely hanging on in the rotation at NBC. Community is one of the best television shows — among sitcoms, specifically — to come along in years.

Actually, it’s not exactly accurate to call the show a sitcom, it’s more like a meta-commentary on what the nature of a sitcom actually is. Then again, that’s the kind of heady material that’s probably limited its mass appeal.

But if meta-narratives and self-referencing are your thing, then check out this trailer for the show.

9:55: Wow, what is Drew Brees wearing? Brees might be referred to as one of sports’ luminaries, but I think that jacket is actually luminescent.

Seriously, that thing is so shiny I might have to shield my eyes.

9:50: Did Chris Berman really just give Mike Piazza credit for helping the country move past 9/11?


9:45: Not necessarily much of a fan of Rob Riggle’s body of work (which includes Step Brothers and 21 Jump Street) but some of his best work was on the subvertive faux-newscast The Daily Show With Jon Stewart.

Follow this link for a collection of Riggle moments on the Comedy Central hit.

9:35: Okay, Nas, awesome.

His late-career albums might be a little questionable, and his collaboration with Damien Marley was downright horrendous, but Illmatic is legitimately one of the top two or three hip hop records ever.

Check out a track from the album on YouTube by following this link. Unsurprisingly, be forewarned, there may be some salty language.

9:30: Why is Zooey Deschanel at the ESPYs?

Don’t get me wrong, Deschanel is a beautiful and talented actress — let’s just try to ignore her musical foray with M. Ward in She & Him — but the doe-eyed star of (500) Days of Summer is really an icon for hipster indie kids, which, let’s be honest, couldn’t be a scene further removed from the sporting world.

Ever walk into a bar in Williamsburg or Allston and hear a debate about the spread offense? Never? Yeah, that’s about right.

9:25: The New England faithful might be disappointed, but the award for breakthrough performer may be the biggest non-shock to come out of this show.

After making consecutive Sports Illustrated covers (and being referenced in the third week) was it really any surprise that Linsanity won out over Rob Gronkowski?

9:20: Okay, you’ve got to admit, Riggle’s opening monologue isn’t too shabby, at least way better than this sort of forum can be.

Except perhaps until he started trying to coin nicknames for Steve Nash, which really fell flat. However, the John Calipari moment was a good one.

The best moment? Probably Riggle taking shots at the New Orleans Saints’ Bountygate scandal. It seemed to get very few laughs in the room, but often times the edgiest humor is the best.

9 p.m. ET: In case you missed the red carpet portion of the ESPY pregame coverage, then you’ll definitely want to be in the know about this moment between injured San Francisco Giants closer Brian Wilson and his plus-1.

Who’d be bring along? Well, if you’re a fan of crytozoology, you might want to head to Los Angeles to catch a glimpse of Sasquatch. Or you can check it out here to see Wilson and his guest sharing a chest-bump.

8 p.m. ET: Since the ESPY Awards were rescheduled in 2002 to coincide with the Major League Baseball All-Star break — with players from all of the four major sports now able to attend — the event has taken on a life of its own, becoming known as one of the more light-hearted, entertaining major awards shows.

This year figures to be no different, as luminaries from the world of sports and general entertainment are set to descend on Los Angeles, the entertainment capital of the world, and the Staples Center on Wednesday night, with the awards set to kick-off beginning at 9 p.m. ET.

This year the ESPYs are set to be hosted by former Saturday Night Live cast member and Daily Show correspondent Rob Riggle, who’s known for his hilarious physical comedy — so you’re probably in store for a laugh or two.

Awards to be handed out include Best Male (and Female) College Athlete, Best Coach/Manager, Best Moment, Best Play, Best Game in addition to a litany of others. Tiger Woods remains the most-honored athlete in the 20th edition of the awards, having taken home 21 ESPYs.

The show begins at 9 p.m., so sit back and follow’s live blog, as we will do our best to provide entertaining and (occasionally) insightful analysis.

Photo via Twitter/2012 ESPYS

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