Fantasy Football 2017: 15 Best Team Names You Definitely Should Use

by abournenesn

Aug 29, 2017

Your fantasy football draft is here, and you’ve done all of your research.

You’ve pored over NESN.com’s comprehensive draft kit (shameless plug alert), studied our robust positional rankings and identified your sleepers and busts. But you still don’t feel 100 percent prepared. Why?

Well, because you haven’t thought of a good fantasy team name. That might seem like a trivial detail, but your name is how you appear to the rest of your league, and no one wants to roll into the season with a dumb or boring moniker. On the flip side, a clever or humorous name could boost your confidence as you eye fantasy glory — look good, play good, as they say.

There are plenty of directions to take a team name: A pun off the name of your star player, a topical pop culture reference or various forms of potty humor all work. Since this is a family site, we’ll stick with the first two.

Here are 15 fantasy team names we love, most of which were stolen from somewhere else. Enjoy.

1. Hilton Rewards
Enjoy your stay at what we hope is Indianapolis Colts wide receiver T.Y. Hilton’s favorite hotel.

2. Kelce Lately
For some reason, we feel like Kansas City Chiefs tight end Travis Kelce and Chelsea Handler would get along.

3. Gone Gurley
The “player + movie pun” is a classic formula — this also describes Todd Gurley’s sophomore season with the Los Angeles Rams, and not in a good way.

4. Dez Dispensers
Like Pez dispensers, Dallas Cowboys wide receiver Dez Bryant opens his mouth a lot.

5. Too Many Cooks
If you draft New England Patriots wideout Brandin Cooks and Minnesota Vikings rookie Dalvin Cook and don’t use this team name, we don’t know what to tell you.

6. It’s Elementary, Deshaun Watson
You don’t need to be Sherlock Holmes to figure out which player this name references.

7. More Than A. Thielen
This wouldn’t be a complete list without an ’80s song reference. Besides, you will, in fact, need more than Minnesota Vikings receiver Adam Thielen to win your league.

8. James White Walkers
We had to work a “Game of Thrones” reference in there. (Alternate name: Delanie White Walkers.)

9. A Team Has No Name
If you’re a “Thrones” buff (and don’t have any punnable players on your team), this might be the winner.

10. Golden Tate Warriors
Unlike the NBA’s Warriors, the Detroit Lions wideout is not an unfairly good superteam. He’s still decent, though.

11. Honey Funchess Of Oats
Has Carolina Panthers receiver Devin Funchess gotten his own cereal line yet?

12. Bilal The Way Up
New York Jets running back Bilal Powell could be in for a big season, so you’d be doing yourself and Fat Joe proud with this one.

13. The Real Life Or Just Fantasy?
Puns off players’ names are easy come, easy go, so why not get a little more creative with a Queen reference?

14. We Will Brock You
Speaking of Queen… Please don’t use this name, because it’d mean you drafted Cleveland Browns quarterback Brock Osweiler.

15. Sorry Hue Jackson, I Am For Real
In fact, you’d be smart not to draft any Browns player, and this team name would firmly declare your allegiance to non-bad football teams.

Click for NESN.com’s 2017 fantasy football draft kit >>

Thumbnail photo via Aaron Doster/USA TODAY Sports Images

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