Fortunately, though, America is too smart to tune in, as the debut episode premiered Tuesday night on Versus, drawing just a 0.1 rating, according to Sports Media Watch.
What's that mean? It means that just 112,000 viewers tuned in.
By contrast, there are 10 times as many people who know everything about Ochocinco's pregnant pigeon via his Twitter feed than there were viewers to his show.
It also means the Bruins-Capitals game that aired on Versus did roughly three times better in terms of ratings, drawing 335,000 viewers. Even the postgame show (151,000) did better than The T.Ocho Show.
Ochocinco doesn't seem to be affected.
"Woke up to pee pee, y'all up still?" he profoundly Tweeted at 1 a.m. Thursday morning.
For T.O., the ratings weren't the worst part of his week, as he was voted as the NFL's most overrated player by his peers. He's still looking for feedback on the TV show.
"How did u guys like show?," he wrote on Twitter. "We're trying 2 honest & candid as can be. Anything u guys would 2 talk about…tweet 2 @TOchoshow w/suggestions."
Chances are, they won't get too many responses.