Is the Empire finally ready to strike back?
It’s been a while since the New York Yankees have lived up to the Evil Empire nickname given to them by Larry Lucchino in 2002, but it appears as though Darth Vader (Yankees general manager Brian Cashman) is finally ready to rule over the galaxy again.
The Yankees general manager all but closed the door on signing free agent star Bryce Harper, but Cashman noted Wednesday his club can change course at any time before dropping a “Star Wars” reference on the media present.
“We’re prepared to pivot and react at any given moment if things change,” Cashman said, per Erik Boland of Newsday. “If something doesn’t make sense today, that doesn’t mean it won’t make sense tomorrow. You know what my focuses are, but at the same time, we’re a fully operational Death Star”
Does anyone want to tell Cashman how “Star Wars: Episode IV – A New Hope” and “Star Wars: Episode VI – Return of the Jedi” end?
For anyone who needs a refresher, the rebel alliance destroys the first Death Star when Luke Skywalker fires two photon torpedoes into the thermal exhaust port, causing a chain reaction that destroys the battle station. In “Return of the Jedi,” the rebel fleet flies into the core and destroys the main reactor.
The point is: it doesn’t end well for the Empire.
If Cashman were a big “Star Wars” fan, he could make the claim he was likening his team’s payroll flexibility to the second Death Star’s expected maneuverability had it ever been completed. The new and improved battle station was supposed to have an increased hyperdrive that would allow it to be more maneuverable. But, as we know, it was never completed.
Back to baseball.
The Yankees have spent their offseason beefing up their rotation to this point. New York acquired left-hander James Paxton in a deal with the Seattle Mariners and reportedly is set to re-sign J.A. Happ. The Yankees also are in the market for a shortstop to fill-in for the injured Didi Gregorius, which many believe will lead them to sign Manny Machado.
As long as Cashman is trying to resurrect the Evil Empire, he might as well sign a guy like Machado who is the perfect candidate to be a Sith apprentice.
OK, we promise we’re done now.
