The Onion’s ’50 Years Of Super Bowl History’ Roasts Patriots, Ray Lewis

Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you know this season’s Super Bowl marks the 50th anniversary of the big game.

Super Bowl 50, which will feature the Carolina Panthers, Denver Broncos and a whole lot of gold, has inspired many to look back at the greatest Super Bowl moments in NFL history.

The Onion recently joined that party, although, as you might expect from the satire website, it took a slightly different approach. In a “50 Years Of Super Bowl History” special, the site took readers through every big game from the Green Bay Packers-Kansas City Chiefs Super Bowl I to Sunday’s upcoming matchup in Santa Clara, Calif.

The Onion provided pithy lines for each big game, and no joke was left off the table. Consider this one, made at the expense of a certain outspoken Denver Broncos tight end for Super Bowl XXXIII: “The game’s second half was delayed while the Broncos were stuck in the locker room listening to a rambling, 45-minute halftime speech from Shannon Sharpe.”

The New England Patriots, of course, weren’t spared. The Onion remarked how the team’s Super Bowl XXXI loss to the Green Bay Packers took place in an era when “watching the Patriots lose in the Super Bowl did not bathe one’s soul in golden warmth and bliss.” And New England’s Super Bowl XXXIX win over the Philadelphia Eagles — their third title in four years — earned the following caption: “The Patriots were really good at cheating by this point.”

For those Patriots fans feeling a bit hot under the collar, though, The Onion also took pretty good shots at Baltimore Ravens linebacker Ray Lewis and NFL commissioner Roger Goodell.