10:17 p.m.: That’s all she wrote, both for the game and for the commercials.
Kim Kardashian’s was the last big one of the night, but it won’t have the most people talking on Monday. That honor will go to Sealy, which had the most risque ad of the evening.
Because I’m just one person and I can’t decide the best commercial on my own (I vote for the finger-licking Doritos guy), let’s put it to a vote.
10:01 p.m.: So much for subtlety.
Skechers used Kim Kardashian, clad in yoga gear, to sell some shoes. The ad didn’t end without a blatant close-up of her butt. I’m sure it was all Skechers.
9:57 p.m.: Was that supposed to be a creative ad by Chevy there? The one where the guys make it up on the fly? Because it was the definition of unoriginal.
Also, the iPhone made its big Verizon ad, and it was forgettable.
9:47 p.m.: Mercedes-Benz responds to Audi’s slam by recruiting … P-Diddy. In a commercial about … nothing.
The House promo that mimicked the mean Joe Greene was pretty funny.
9:45 p.m.: GoDaddy is the least creative company in the world, yet it keeps coming back every year. This time, Danica Patrick and Jillian Michaels get nude, and you don’t see anything, and they tell you to go to GoDaddy.com. I’ve never followed through on the GoDaddy offers, but I’m betting you don’t see what you want to see.
9:36 p.m.: Pepsi Max, which has had three commercials thus far, tried its hand at attempting to be controversial. It wasn’t funny, but at least nobody got hit in the privates or head with a flying can.
9:33 p.m.: At long last, Bud Light provides us with a decent ad. Some dogs serving beer and food. I’ll give it a three out of 10, which is better than anything else Bud Light’s produced thus far.
9:23 p.m.: The NFL did a nice job by putting football apparel on some of the most iconic television characters in history. It’ll definitely have people talking on Monday morning, but about what?
9:17 p.m.: We’re on a 15-minute commercial drought! What’s that about?!
9:02 p.m.: Whoa. That Eminem ad for Chrysler was intense. Almost made me want to move to Detroit for a minute. If it were a film, though, I think we’d be disputing its accuracy.
8:55 p.m.: Adrian Brody sings Italian and drinks Stella Artois. That commercial was lame.
Also, Simon Cowell thinks he’s so epic, getting put together piece-by-piece like that. Get over it, already, Simon.
8:51 p.m.: I’m not entirely up on all that is going on with Tibet, but it’s probably not at the stage where it can be used as a joke. Timothy Hutton and Groupon, however, did just that.
Then, Coca-Cola took two foreign guards forging a temporary friendship thanks to soda. On a hot day, I’d probably prefer water, but you know, I’ve never patrolled a desert before so I’ll take Coke’s word for it.
8:44 p.m.: Does anyone know why that “test baby” just mushed its face up against the glass? I found that confusing.
8:38 p.m.: The second half is under way, with Justin Bieber making his triumphant appearance, thereby making every 14-year-old girl in America scream, “Ohhhhhhh!”
Ozzy Osbourne played a very believable old, confused man. Wonder where he got his inspiration.
And the always-famous eTrade baby made his appearance, this time having a freaky relationship with Enzo the tailor. Too much there, I think.
8:03 p.m.: OK, let’s stop relying on my arbitrary feelings, and let’s put it to a vote. I’m thinking the funniest two ads were the Darth Vader spot for Volkswagen and the Doritos Finger Licker. I’ve heard from Twitter, and Twitter wants the Telflora ad. And BrandBowl2011.com has the Eminem ad as No. 1 (seems fishy to me).
So here’s a poll. Vote for your favorite ad of the first half.
P.S. — How shocked are you that Bud Light isn’t on this list?
7:50 p.m.: Chevrolet could try to do things like create a car with a swimming pool in the back, but instead, they figured out a way to let you go on Facebook while driving. Because that’s what America needs.
Also, Captain America definitely works out, and that Carmax ad was pretty silly. I feel like a kid in a candy store.
7:47 p.m.: I didn’t think much of the Teleflora “your rack is unreal” ad, but I got some Twitter feedback saying it should be on the unofficial list of funniest of the night. So I’ll add it.
Teleflora “Your rack is unreal”
Doritos Finger Licker
Darth Vader for Volkswagen
7:41 p.m.: It’s not quite Betty White, but Richard Lewis and Roseanne Barr filled in rather nicely in this year’s edition of Snickers’ Super Bowl ad.
Also, Super 8 looks epic, and CareerBuilder.com successfully went back to the monkey well. Monkeys are always funny. Fact.
7:33 p.m.: The Darth Vader ad that everybody saw on the Internet this week aired, and still drew some giggles around the country. Natalie Portman, who’s in every movie nowadays, is in Thor, and a dragon shot fireworks out of his mouth after drinking a Coca-Cola.
So far, the Darth Vader ad and the Dorito finger licker are the best two ads. I’d bet America agrees with me.
7:28 p.m.: Raise your hand if you saw that badass cowboy busting out “Tiny Dancer.” That was a funny one. The Faith Hill for Teleflora ad was a lame attempt at controversy.
Transformers 3 had sweet music, the Motorola Xoom 1984 ad was captivating and the BMW ads were very meh, in this man’s opinion.
7:18 p.m.: For whatever reason, Sealy decided to spend millions on a Super Bowl commercial, and for whatever reason, the company decided to go the controversial route.
It basically showed a bunch of nude couples, happily looking into each others’ eyes, followed by a Sealy logo. All right, then.
7:17 p.m.: If you want to introduce a new domain, apparently Joan Rivers is the day to do it. That’s what GoDaddy.co (not a typo) is trying to do.
Unfortunately, the “Reply All” Bridgestone ad will be overshadowed by that weird commercial break.
7:09 p.m.: Eminem was just yelling for 30 seconds in a decent ad, but that’s not very hardcore, Mr. Mathers.
7:06 p.m.: Aliens & Cowboys is a film about, you guessed it, aliens and cowboys. We now know that.
We also know that the folks at Kia spent billions to make a commercial the company itself called “epic.” But it wasn’t. Come on, Kia. That was a waste of a billion dollars.
7:03 p.m.: Pepsi Max takes another stab at slapstick humor, and it’s lame (cans shooting out of a cooler and hitting a rich guy in the junk). Doritos wins again with chips that bring fishes and dead grandpas to life. And Hyundai Elantras are boring.
6:58 p.m.: Rest easy, Fast And Furious fans! A new installment is on the way, and it looks like it’ll be named Fastest and Furiousest and Rockest or something like that.
There was another ad with a Chevy truck playing the role of Lassie, which was fun. And Bud Light’s product placement in a Three Musketeers-type movie. Another dud for Bud Light, no?
6:52 p.m.: The Doritos “creepy guy who licks the other dude’s finger” is an early favorite for the best commercial of the night.
The Chevy Cruze Eco nursing home ad was terrible, and the Pepsi Max ad was a poor attempt at slapstick comedy. Boo.
6:46 p.m.: We just saw an ad from Bud Light, Doritos and Audi.
The Audi one was the most elaborate, with a pair of old rich guys “escaping the confines of old luxury” by breaking out of a rich prison. Kenny G popping up at the end was a surprise touch.
The Doritos ad was pretty good, with a guy taunting a dog with Doritos, only to have the dog knock the door over. Registered on the chuckle meter, but nothing special.
The Bud Light one was uncharacteristically lame, with the fake home improvement show. Something tells me Bud Light has something better planned for later.
6:34 p.m.: First commercial break post-coin flip was a Ford Focus ad. There was some racing in the desert. They were trying to get people to “join our team” without actually telling them what the whole deal is about. Impact scale: 1 of 5.
6:26 p.m.: A LivingSocial ad was utterly perplexing in that first group of commercials. The moral of the story is, apparently, that LivingSocial will allow a man to dress up like a woman?
6:20 p.m.: Just minutes from game time now, and George and Laura Bush are in the house. He’s probably bummed he won’t get to see the funny commercials tonight.
5:22 p.m.: We’re closing in on game time, which means we’re closing in commercial time.
The big news out of Dallas at this hour is that roughly 1,000 people who thought they were going to the Super Bowl are no longer going to the Super Bowl. No big deal, Jerry Jones, those people probably won’t mind that their sections are closed.
Anyway, with roughly 45 billion people tuning in to the game, there’s no way that all those people can possibly love football. So here’s a poll — what are you more excited for?
8 a.m.: The big day is finally here.
No, not the Super Bowl; the day of Super Bowl commercials.
Up until recently, the game generally stunk, with one team blowing the other team out of the building. Commercials became as much a part of the show as the game itself, and the tradition continues this year.
Here’s a look at some of the companies expected to be dropping millions for 30 seconds of your time.
The game won’t kick off until after 6:30 p.m., so in the meantime share some of your favorite Super Bowl commercials and discuss what you’re most looking forward to in the comments section below.